New year, new scar

As I mentioned earlier this week, I had a derm appointment on New Years Eve. Weird, I know, but it takes two months to get an appointment with my doctor, so I take what I can get. I've gotten several text messages and emails asking how things went, so here's the DL: one of the spots I was worried about looked suspicious to my doctor, too. They took a biopsy, and I should be hearing back within a week or two. Lucky me got to have stitches on NYE. Fun! (not)

I've had spots biopsied since my melanoma, but there was something eery about this appointment that gave me deja vu. The spot they biopsied was just this small, dark freckle that's popped up over the past year or so with slightly uneven pigmentation. It's not related to the old cancerous spot at all, but it's mere inches from my old scar. I think the proximity of it freaked me out a little bit. I mean, what are the chances that I get two primary melanomas right next to one another? Granted, I did burn that part of my body pretty bad back when I tanned, so maybe it's coming back to bite me in the ass. Who knows. Not going to worry about it for now.

My friend Melissa wrote a provocative blog post the other day in response to comments that were made on Facebook about stage I melanoma bloggers. As I've said before, I know I've never had to go through anything nearly as awful as my late-stage melanoma friends. But that doesn't mean I can't empathize with them and relate. One of the shitty things about skin cancer is once you've had it, you're exponentially more likely to get it again. Every time I go to the dermatologist for the rest of my life I get to worry: Is it back? Will it be worse this time? As Melissa said in her post: "We all know one loose cell and a stage 1 can become a stage 4 in a heartbeat." True statement.

No matter how you spin it and no matter how good or bad you have it, melanoma blows. I don't think any of us like writing about this stuff. Did you know I used to be a fashion & beauty blogger before all this? (OK, maybe you can tell by my sporadic product review posts.) But if we're not writing about it, then nothing is going to change. People are going to continue being diagnosed.

So fingers are crossed for good news. On a lighter note, I'm stoked for 2013. Lots of exciting things planned. Weddings, lots of travel, event planning madness, and more. Thank you to all my readers and friends for your continued love and support. I'm way behind on email, life, etc. so if I owe you an email, I promise I'll be in touch soon :)

Spot check

When I called my dermatologist to make a routine appointment back in November, I think I spaced it when they told me my appointment was going to be on December 31, 2012. Who schedules a dermatologist appointment on New Years Eve? Well, apparently me.

I have a couple spots that have been worrying me. I'm sure they're nothing, but it's hard not to be a hypochondriac after one of my seemingly harmless moles turned out to be skin cancer.

Post-appointment, it's Les Mis with my mom, and a low-key NYE. Do you have anything fun planned for tomorrow night?

Does this look like a cancer patient to you?

May is Melanoma Awareness Month. Please help spread the word by sharing this post with your friends and family. 

Earlier this week, my friend Rachael, the brains behind the Glenna Kohl Fund for Hope's social media outreach, posted this picture on Facebook of Glenna on her graduation day. If you're part of the melanoma club, you may already be familiar with Glenna's story (if not, you can read up on Cosmo). Long story short: this photo was taken mere months before Glenna found out she had stage III melanoma. She died four years later at age 26.

The other day, I was out having a drink with a friend of mine when I mentioned the Portland Melanoma Walk.

"Oh yeah, you had melanoma, right? Well, if your going to get cancer, at least it's just skin cancer, right?"

I love my friend. She is a very intelligent young woman, but in this instance she was all wrong. This is an uphill battle that many of us early-stage melanoma survivors face. Superficially, it may look like we just had to have a funky mole removed, and then things were golden again. But let me remind you that I had the very same type of cancer Glenna had, and she died. This vibrant, beautiful, fun-loving girl died because of skin cancer.

Sometimes I look back at pictures of myself over the holidays in 2009. I had just had my mole biopsied, and was completely unaware that there was anything malignant growing on my body. Unless you looked at my skin cells under a microscope, you would have had no idea that there was anything wrong with me. You can look healthy and happy but still be at risk for developing a deadly disease. Just look at Glenna on her graduation day. Does she look like your stereotypical "cancer patient"? Maybe that's part of the reason why melanoma is so dangerous. It's sneaky and ruthless.

So, two takeaway messages for this lovely Thursday evening:

1. Don't ever underestimate the dangers of skin cancer. Just last week, at the melanoma walk, I met friends and family members of three more individuals who lost their lives to melanoma.
2. No one knows your body like you do (OK, except for maybe your significant other). So check yourself out in the mirror. (Just don't take creepy pictures of yourself and post them on Facebook.) Notice if anything changes or looks suspicious. If so, go talk to your derm. It's likely nothing, but you'll thank me if it's not.